Becoming a Leader and Role Model

Kyle Snyder has achieved everything in wrestling. Undefeated in high school. NCAA champion. World Champion. Olympic Champion.

The current Ohio State Buckeye heavyweight has also become something else:

A leader. A role model. Someone young wrestlers want to emulate, on and off the mat.

But Snyder will be the first tell you becoming a leader and role model had nothing to do with his success on the mat. It happened, over time, by doing the right things on and off the mat.

“Team leaders and role models evolve by being the person that sets the standard for your organization or team,” says Snyder. “That doesn’t necessarily mean you need to be a state champ, but it does mean you always strive to be the best in every aspect of your life, and have unwavering work ethic. Leaders and role models also treat everyone with respect, get excited to come to work, and have a willingness to help others in need.”

Carl Perry is the Director of Fellowship of Christian Athletes Wrestling, a nonprofit organization that among other things, strives to develop, encourage, and mentor athletes to not only win wrestling matches, but prepare them for real life after wrestling. Perry is also the former Associate Head Wrestling Coach at the University of Illinois and a 2000 NCAA DI 141 pound national champion.

Throughout his time in sport, Perry has seen several wrestlers who were dominant on the mat, but failed to become leaders or role models because they didn’t do what he says is the "next right thing." Perry says focusing on being consistent and disciplined, and doing the “next right thing” will help young boys and girls, wrestlers, and athletes in all sports, organically become a leader or model. Some may not realize it, but through their actions – not words – they set high standards and others respect and gravitate to that.

“I remember seeing wrestlers who were successful on the mat fail in this area because they refused to do the “next right thing.”

How so?

“They would take the easy way out, not show up on time, make poor social decisions, and it would be about them, and not the team,” Perry says.

Doing the “next right thing,” he says, is about going the extra mile, caring about your teammates and classmates, and leading by example.

When an individual shows these positive qualities as a young boy or girl, they are more likely to continue doing that as they become adults, Perry says.

“This is crucial because the same traits and qualities one shows on and off the mat as a youth or high school athlete will likely mirror their behavior as they become a husband, wife, father, mother, coach, or business person,” he says.

José Valenzuela, President/Founder of Boston Youth Wrestling (Boston, MA), a nonprofit wrestling club whose mission is to “give kids a fighting chance,” says being a team leader and role model entails believing in something bigger than yourself.

So for the past three summers, Boston Youth Wrestling has funded nearly 25 summer jobs for high school wrestlers to serve as coaches at youth wrestling camps and clinics across Greater Boston.

“We believe one of the most crucial ways to become a leader is to teach,” Valenzuela says. “Learning how to teach is the ultimate form of knowledge. In order to coach another wrestler one must be patient, knowledgeable, clear in their directions, and encouraging, among other skills.”

Learning how to teach others, and focus on the needs of another person, or multiple people, has helped several club members grow as people.

“Every summer, those high school kids come away with more confidence in themselves, and in turn a greater belief in the mission of sharing this great sport with even more young people,” Valenzuela says. “They know that what makes a great leader is sharing with others and bringing others less fortunate than themselves along the way, leaving no man or woman behind.”

Steve Fraser is now Chief of Donor and Alumni Relations for USA Wrestling. Prior to that, he was USA Wrestling’s National Greco-Roman Coach for more than 18 years. As a competitor, Fraser won a Gold Medal at 90 kg (198 pounds) at the 1984 Olympics in Los Angeles.

Every great team Fraser was on had outstanding leadership, from multiple people on and off the mat. The best leaders, Fraser says, set the tone and the attitude, and understand all the hard work it takes to be a winner. In the wrestling room, a good leader is an extension of the coaches/coaching system.

“A leader should be someone who takes what the coaches are saying and doing, and supports that,” says Fraser. “The leader should help convince the team that the path they are on is the right path. Confidence is important. Belief is important. Trust is important. The leader should be someone who can show great vision, passion, and excitement for the direction of the team/effort. Leaders lead by example.”

Coyte Cooper, Ph.D., is a former Division I wrestler for Indiana University, who is now a bestselling author, motivational keynote speaker, and performance coach passionate about empowering people to live to potential.

Cooper says a leader is someone who steps up and makes everyone around them better. In the wrestling room they show up early for practice, they listen to the coaches, go the extra mile, and help others—from the best wrestlers, to the new kid who just joined the program. Off the mat, they value academics, find ways to give back in the community, and treat others—including those outside of their wrestling fraternity—with respect.

“The best leaders earn the respect of others by stepping up and modeling the right values on a daily basis," says Cooper. "This has nothing to do with choosing the easy route. Instead, they identify the path that will allow them to accomplish unique things and they take that route."

Becoming a leader, however, has to be earned, over time.

"So many people want instant and easy in today's society,” Cooper says. “Leaders fight off this urge and instead commit to a daily routine that EARNS extraordinary! When you have leaders that do this, the entire team ends up better in every important aspect."

When all is said and done, a leader and role model sets the standards through their actions, and aims high. Snyder has proven he can do that over and over, and an entire generation of wrestlers looks to him as a leader, and role model.

“By setting the standard through your actions, you are the one that consistently demonstrates to everyone else that you want to learn, you want to make sacrifices, and you want to be the best wrestler that you can possibly be,” Snyder says. “And you want the same for others, not just yourself.”