Women's wrestler Leigh Jaynes making the most out of life

When you watch Leigh Jaynes on the mat, you can see that she has some special gifts as an athlete. Until you spend some time with her, you don't understand just how tough she truly is. Off the mat, that is.

Tough is an understatement when you talk about the challenges that Jaynes faced since childhood. Tough is also a description of the kind of fortitude she has shown in creating a life for herself in spite of the odds against her.

Leigh Jaynes, who competes for the New York Athletic Club, is a hopeful for the 2012 Olympic Team, an officer in the U.S. Army Reserves with a graduate college degree and an inspiring story of hope.

"She is a heroic American story," said her high school coach Brian Bowker. "She has had her ups and downs. As far as being a quality human being, I coach wrestling for people like Leigh Jaynes. If you want to know what wrestling can do for you, just ask Leigh Jaynes."

Leigh Jaynes had to deal with major family crisis from the day she was born. Her father, Clayton Jaynes, was a Vietnam veteran who suffered from post traumatic stress disorder and drug issues. Her mother, Karen Williams, tried to help Clayton, but could not get him the help necessary. Right after Leigh was born, Karen left Clayton to provide her children with a healthier environment.

"She struggled as a single mother of two young children, working two jobs to make a life for us," said Leigh Jaynes. "When I was 12, she suffered mood changes and personality problems. She wasn't the same person I knew anymore. Naturally, the state felt she was having a nervous breakdown from the stress. So the Division of Youth and Family Services recommended she be medicated and my brother Michael and I were placed in temporary care of the state."

Months later, when the children were reunited with their mother, the circumstances did not improve.

"We returned a few months later, hoping that life would return to normal. It didn't. Things got worse and her behavior became more and more unusual. She was sick and I didn't understand at the time," said Jaynes. "I was placed in home after home and finally ended up at the Stepping Stones Group Home in Mt. Laurel, NJ. I spent four years in that home and was emancipated at 16, living in and out of friends houses."

The sad twist to the story was that Karen Williams was finally diagnosed with a small tumor in her brain caused by neurological damage. It traces back to a cheerleading injury from college. When the tumor was treated, life improved dramatically for Karen, but she had already lost custody of her children.

Meanwhile, Leigh Jaynes had to learn how to survive on her own, within a harsh system where children often get lost in the shuffle. Somehow, Leigh found her way through it all.

"At the group home, the girls there did some miserable things. But I decided I would not lay down and die. I asked myself, 'Is this life? If this is life, I don't want to be a part of it.' But, I decided this can't be it. There has got to be more positive things out there," said Jaynes.

As a high school senior, basically on a dare, Leigh Jaynes took a challenge from Coach Bowker to prove herself and try out for wrestling. She has been wrestling ever since. Both Jaynes and Bowker remember the importance of this life opportunity.

"I was on a rockclimbing trip with Brian with a youth group. He said, 'so you guys think you are tough, you couldn't last two weeks in the wrestling room.' I said that I could do that," said Jaynes. "Later, I asked him if I could really try out for wrestling. He said, 'Let's see what you got.'"

Bowker liked her spirit and attitude, and felt that wrestling might be an answer for her.

"I have a knack for spotting kids with an edge to them. She was a confident kid. She was interesting to me," said Bowker. "The climbing and backpacking trip was very difficult. But I couldn't break this kid. No matter what situation she was in, she was mentally tough. I challenged her to come out for wrestling. Sure enough, she showed up in the wrestling room. That person had dealt with more adversity than all those adults who were trying to help her."

Jaynes was not an instant success in wrestling, especially as a girl on a successful boys high school team in New Jersey, considered one of the sport's hotbeds.

"I did other sports and made the teams on the first tryout. I was good at these sports and everything else," said Jaynes. "Wrestling was something I wasn't good at. I got beat up pretty good in practice. I lost every single varsity match I had against guys. It was a challenge. I said to myself that there has to be a way I could do that well."

Somehow in her mind, wrestling offered her a true test of herself as a person.

"Wrestling seemed harder than life at the time," said Jaynes. "It was a challenge that taught me that nothing good will occur if you just sit around and feel sorry for the things that have happened to you. I learned to get out there and fight. I realized that victories can be achieved, one battle at a time."

Joining wrestling changed her life and opened a new world of opportunity. However, perhaps the most important thing it did for her was expose her to the wrestling family.

"I had a lot of issues. I was angry. I bucked the system because the system bucked me. I had some behavior problems. I didn't trust anybody. I was socially withdrawn. Wrestling was able to establish for me a community, a group I could be a part of," said Jaynes.

After the high school season, Bowker and the community raised money for her to attend the USGWA Nationals in Michigan, where she was an All-American. It could have been her last wrestling competition, but things did not turn out that way.

That summer, the Bowkers were working managing Faria's Surf Shop on Long Beach Island, a tourist location on the Jersey Shore. They were able to get Leigh a job working there and a small apartment above the shop where she could live.

"She became a part of the Bowker clan. She worked at the surf shop and did a great job there. She babysat our kids. She was a part of our family," said Bowker.

Missouri Valley coach Mike Maccholz was putting together the women's wrestling team at his college, and saw a picture of Jaynes in Wrestling USA magazine because of her USGWA performance. When Maccholz tried to reach Jaynes, Brian's wife Eileen fielded the call. An athletic trainer who has been active with USA Wrestling's national program, Eileen understood the recruiting process as well as Leigh Jaynes' personal situation. Before conversation was over, Missouri Valley agreed to make Jaynes a scholarship athlete.

"Eileen picked up the phone. She didn't even ask me. She said you are going," said Jaynes.

For Eileen Bowker, all Leigh Jaynes needed was a chance to prove herself.

"We knew she didn't have the money to go to college," said Eileen Bowker. "The only possession she had was an automobile. She threw everything she had in that car and went. She really knew she could do it. We were always back here cheering for her. We wanted her to know that she wasn't doing it alone."

Jaynes was not an immediate success as a wrestler or a student at Missouri Valley College. But it was there that she found another positive influence in her life.

"I realized I was spiraling out of control there," said Jaynes. "I needed to find some structure there to help me, somebody to lay down the law. I felt the military would be great for me. I love the USA and wanted to serve our country. I have a long family history of service in the military. Once I joined the military, I went from ninth-team in our room to being No. 1 on the women's college circuit in my weight."

In her junior year of Missouri Valley, Leigh enlisted in the Army and commissioned for officer through the ROTC program. While she was going through her officer training, she was also able to secure as masters degree in Business Management from Lindenwood Unversity.

"I learned that I could use my ROTC for continuing eduation. I had a chance to do my masters work. I got my masters and was commissioned as an officer at the same time," said Jaynes.

Wrestling remained an important part of her life, even after finishing college. Jaynes moved to Colorado Springs, Colo. where she could train fulltime at the U.S. Olympic Training Center and continue to pursue her military career. Jaynes is currently a First Lieutenant in the U.S. Army Reserve, serving as a Platoon Leader at the Headquarters Platoon at the 5502ns US Army Hospital in Aurora, Colo.

Jaynes made her first major breakthrough in international freestyle wrestling in 2007, when she won the U.S. National Championships and qualified for the U.S. Women's World Team at 59 kg/130 lbs. She competed in the World Championships in Baku, Azerbaijan, losing her only match to a competitor from World power Japan.

In 2008, Jaynes dropped down to an Olympic weight class at 55 kg/121 lbs., but fell short of her goal of qualifying for the U.S. Olympic Team. She has since made a personal commitment to pursue another four-year Olympic cycle, training daily at the U.S. Olympic Training Center.

"This past year, when I did not make it to Beijing, I realized that there is a certain percentage chance that you won't make the U.S. team," said Jaynes. "I am now having fun narrowing that gap and reducing the percentages that I will make the next Olympic team."

She has since joined the New York Athletic Club program, which has often supported talented wrestlers like Jaynes who were from the New York tri-state area.

"To have the New York AC commit to me for the next four years was great for me," said Jaynes. "I know that I won't have significant changes in my training situation. Everybody is committed all around. I believe great things can come out of this."

National Women's Coach Terry Steiner feels that if Jaynes can concentrate on her wrestling career, she has a great opportunity to continue her improvement.

"I've talked to Leigh about having a consistent environment," said Steiner. "She needs to settle in and focus on what she needs to do. It seems she is doing that now. That is a huge thing. If we get that directed, that is the path for success. She is an intelligent person and is very resourceful. She knows how to get things done."

Jaynes also draws inspiration from her challenging personal journey, including her relationship with her mother.

"I know my mother did what she knew was best and only ever wanted us to be successful members of society," said Jaynes. "Although I still cope with the past, it's overcoming these obstacles that has made me as strong as I am today. I wouldn't change a thing. My mother is the foundation of my will and perseverance and it will be largely because of her when I achieve my goals in wrestling."

Those who knew Leigh Jaynes when she was young and struggling to survive also believe in her dream.

"My daughters are incredible people, and I would be proud if they were like Leigh Jaynes," said Eileen Bowker. "She is honest, hard working, basic to the core. I have never heard her complain. For her, the glass is always half full."